Patient Spotlight: Marion & Chad
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Here I am pregnant with Paige in 2015
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On 1/28/2015, I gave birth to Paige the most beautiful girl I have ever seen:
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Our empty nursery:
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Without the strong support system of my family and friends we would have never made it through this difficult time
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Blanket drive to remember Paige:
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Here I am in another effort to conceive by doing Intra Lipid treatments….it did not work.
I tried two more times after Paige, but it did not work out.
We were advised to investigate surrogacy. We found an amazing surrogate mother and we had Collin who is now 4 years old. It was the best day in our lives! We were finally happy, and all the pain we had felt was worth it.
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Best text message picture I’ve ever got – from our surrogate – it took!!!!!
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Here we are October 2017 on our way to meet baby Colin
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First time holding Collin born on January 31, 2017. It was so unreal!
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Bringing Colin home to Dallas
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Look! I am a Mom!!
Then a few months later, I wanted to try one more time so I could say: “I tried again but it didn’t work”. I just wanted to put my mind at ease and say “I’m done with IVF”; well, we transferred one frozen embryo and I got pregnant with Berkley who is now 2 years and 9 months old.
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We tried again for a sibling thinking it was not going to work! But it did! Here are those famous two lines!
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I tested early (5 days before the 1st beta test) and yes I did test every day to see if the second line got more visible…:
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This is one of maybe three total pregnancy pictures we took (I did not want any memories because I was convinced something would go wrong and we would not have a baby that would be born alive.
We had a turbulent pregnancy, with lots of anxiety and a condition called placenta vasa previa. Due to that I delivered her at 35 weeks, she was not able to hold her oxygen and had to go to the NICU right away. She was in the NICU for 2.5 weeks before she was able to come home.
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Berkley was born July 19th, 2018 and was rushed to the NICU
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First time holding Berkley; I could not believe she was actually alive!
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2.5 weeks later she’s coming HOME! I still could not believe it. I actually gave birth to a healthy baby who is ALIVE!!!!!
You would think at this point we would be done, a boy, a girl…all good! Well, that was not the case, we wanted more kids and I tried again in 2019 and miscarried little Dillon, he was a healthy boy.
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Here I am pregnant with Dillon after doing Intra Lipid treatment with Dr. Saleh. Unfortunately, the outcome was a miscarriage and D&C.
Then in November of 2020 we tried again, and I was 20 weeks pregnant with little Logan who passed away in utero, he was a healthy boy. My uterus and specifically my placenta (I had a condition called placenta accreta) was not able to support little Logan and so I had to deliver him by having a total hysterectomy. A c-section was not possible due to other complications.
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Pregnant with Logan – outcome at 20 weeks complete hysterectomy:
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Here I am after surgery and I’m still trying to smile:
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A few days after loss of baby Logan and hysterectomy, back home:
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A week later at Thanksgiving back to “normal” – what you don’t see on here, I can barely stand up:
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Collin & Berkley end of 2020:
Now, April 2021, we have a surrogate mother ready to start meds and hopefully carry our baby. So, if everything goes well, we might have our third baby in 2022.
All in all, now that we have Collin and Berkley and our angels it was all worth it, it was NOT easy, but I am grateful we have our babies alive and not alive. We love all of them in the same way. Unfortunate, some of them are just not here on earth with us but I believe we will see them again!
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Berkley and me today:
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Easter 2021
For those of you that are going through infertility or child loss this is what I would tell you:
– We did not understand what we were getting ourselves into when we started “all this”. Everyone’s journey is different, but it is a journey!
– Always know that you are NOT ALONE throughout this rollercoaster of infertility
– Anytime I read something about risks of IVF pregnancies, I always thought, well, ok, but it’s not going to happen to me…and then it did. Be prepared for anything.
– Your body is almost like a “machine” it resets itself with every period. But your mind does not work that way, it is so delicate and powerful. It is most important to focus on a healthy mind. And your partnership with your spouse.
– Nothing can be forced.
– The past 10+ years have been a stressful rollercoaster ride that is hopefully coming to an end soon, however it also seemed like we could not stop this journey even though we sometimes wanted to (even if for a minute) but then gathered all our strength and moved forward.
– A healthy baby will never replace a lost baby. Never!
– The void we have been feeling of losing Paige, Dillon and Logan can never be closed. We have to accept it and be at peace with what has happened to us.
– Once you have a healthy baby in your arms, “it’s not over”. I always thought once I have “a baby” I will be at peace but caring for a newborn is also stressful and you need to be healthy and strong for it.
– Depression and anxiety are normal and common for whoever goes through IVF. Lean on your support system!
– Learn how to GRIEVE
– Yes, we are now at peace with our journey.
– You’ll learn how to be patient – which was not my strength…
– I thought every time a cycle did not work, I was failing, which was a terrible feeling BUT know that the outcome is out of your control!
– I felt my body failed me and I failed my babies we’ve lost – again don’t beat yourself up, it’s out of your control, none of the failed IVF’s or pregnancies are your fault. – forgive your body.
– It is not your fault!
– I’m grateful for all we had to go through, it made me stronger, and I am the person I am today. I know I can handle anything.
– Don’t forget your partner throughout this journey, though the woman must do the “heavy lifting” your partner goes through it with you. Stick together – always!